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It occurred to me that there wouldn't be world hunger, if you people would MOVE WHERE THE FOOD IS!!!

Sam Kinison

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Sam Kinison
Age: 38 †
Born: 1953
Born: December 8
Died: 1992
Died: April 10
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Preacher
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Yakima
Washington
Samuel Burl Kinison
Hunger
Wouldn
Move
Food
Moving
Would
World
People
Occurred

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I'm responsible. I even did a commercial for MTV saying how I was going to register to vote. And I still haven't.
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My view of life is, 'If you're going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!
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I called a detox center - just to see how much it would cost: $13,000 for three weeks! My friends, if you can come up with thirteen grand, you don't have a problem yet.
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There's no happy ending to cocaine. You either die, you go to jail, or else you run out.
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You don't know what a rough crowd is. If all I have to do is go make people laugh, that's nothing. Let me tell you what a tough crowd is. A tough crowd is going to a morning service and you got six people there and you gotta pay your house payment. That's a tough crowd.
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In the 1990s, it's OK to do comedy about the Chernobyl disaster or the Space Shuttle blowing up. It's acceptable to ridicule the Pope or the President of the United States, but God forbid you do a joke... about gays. The gay community is the last sacred cow in this society.
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I don't deny my life-style is occasionally pretty wild.
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When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man.
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Jesus had a tough life. I read about that guy. Jesus is the only guy that ever came back from the dead that didn't scare the F- out of everybody!
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I want to show people that there's a side of myself other than just the outrageous comedian.
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Ive never been against women. That anti-feminist rap is bogus. I think men should be nice to women, buy them diamonds.
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How does a guy look at another guy's hairy ass, and find love?
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It was great to be the rock comic, the shock comic. But after you've played Giants Stadium with Bon Jovi in front of 82,000 people, after you've done the 'Wild Thing' video with Jessica Hahn and every rock band from hell, you're not gonna top that.
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I started saying things in church that didn't meet with a lot of approval - like 'Jesus isn't coming back.' They started throwing Bibles.
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I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock n roll and ex-wives. In that order.
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If I've learned one thing, it's 'don't tell the truth.' Lies keep you together.
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John Goodman isn't fat. He's in a category beyond fat. What does one call it? Whalelike.
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I'd rather entertain people than offend them.
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I have lived a carnal life. My view of life is 'If you're going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!' I don't have to go through the thing of paying for it in the next life. I know I'm screwed in the next life.
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You know what the problem is with world hunger? We've been sending them food.
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