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Half of all home accidents happen in the kitchen, and the family has to eat them.
Sam Ewing
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Sam Ewing
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: April 9
Baseball Player
Tennessee
United States
Samuel James Ewing
Family
Happens
Home
Kitchen
Accidents
Happen
Half
More quotes by Sam Ewing
When you feel neglected, think of the female salmon, who lays 3,000,000 eggs but no one remembers her on Mother's Day.
Sam Ewing
Nobody's too fat - they're just too short.
Sam Ewing
Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf.
Sam Ewing
Life begins as a quest of the child for the man, and ends as a journey by the man to rediscover the child.
Sam Ewing
Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.
Sam Ewing
Highways are full of careless drivers who are always too close in front of you.
Sam Ewing
Don't drive as if you own the road drive as if you own the car.
Sam Ewing
We are all born into the world with nothing. Everything we acquire after that is profit.
Sam Ewing
Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms.
Sam Ewing
A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
Sam Ewing
The trouble with giving advice is that others want to return the favor.
Sam Ewing
As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown up, a credit card does it.
Sam Ewing
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
Sam Ewing
The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists.
Sam Ewing
President Herbert Hoover returned his salary to the government. His idea caught on, and now we're all doing it.
Sam Ewing
On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. The question is, why doesn't the plane just become a boat?
Sam Ewing
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.
Sam Ewing
Ever notice that nothing changes the color of paint like putting it on a wall?
Sam Ewing
The reason that so many of us cannot save money is because of our friends. They're always buying something we can't afford.
Sam Ewing
When a husband says, I run things in my home he may mean the washing machine, the dishwasher and the vacuum cleaner.
Sam Ewing