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Half of all home accidents happen in the kitchen, and the family has to eat them.

Sam Ewing

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Sam Ewing
Age: 75
Born: 1949
Born: April 9
Baseball Player
Tennessee
United States
Samuel James Ewing
Family
Happens
Home
Kitchen
Accidents
Happen
Half

More quotes by Sam Ewing

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A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
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Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.
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The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists.
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The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect.
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Some people are much like blisters-they don't show up until the work is done.
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Highways are full of careless drivers who are always too close in front of you.
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Computers are like bikinis. They save people a lot of guesswork.
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Success has a simple formula: do your best, and people may like it.
Sam Ewing
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Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms.
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President Herbert Hoover returned his salary to the government. His idea caught on, and now we're all doing it.
Sam Ewing
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As a child, a library card takes you to exotic, faraway places. When you're grown up, a credit card does it.
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If we are what we eat, why aren't we new, improved, fat-free, and light.
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
Sam Ewing
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Don't drive as if you own the road drive as if you own the car.
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On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. The question is, why doesn't the plane just become a boat?
Sam Ewing
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Youth is when you think you'll live forever. Old age is when you wonder how you've lived so long.
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If you believe the past can't be changed, you haven't read a celebrity's autobiography.
Sam Ewing
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In many instances, marriage vows would be more accurate if the phrase were changed to 'Until debt do us part'.
Sam Ewing
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The reason that so many of us cannot save money is because of our friends. They're always buying something we can't afford.
Sam Ewing
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The trouble with giving advice is that others want to return the favor.
Sam Ewing