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If your body is 90% water what have you got to drink water all the time for? Why can't you just have some crisps?

Russell Brand

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Russell Brand
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: June 4
Actor
Autobiographer
Blogger
Columnist
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Guitarist
Journalist
Musician
Novelist
Playwright
Poet
Grays
Essex
Russell Edward Brand
Crisps
Drink
Comedy
Water
Funny
Body
Time

More quotes by Russell Brand

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People have always said, are you gay? I've had a lot of that. But it's just not in me. I really like women a lot I'm repulsed by men sexually.
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What was alien was being ordinary, being humdrum, being trapped into appeasing...having to crush and stifle my opinions, not being allowed to be brilliant, tricking myself into mediocrity.
Russell Brand
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Socialism isn't a dirty word it just means sharing. Really, it's just the bureaucratic arm of Christianity.
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If you're a drug addict, then you've always got drugs, so you're a criminal. So you're gonna get into problems.
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Turns out it was mostly a lie. But, at least for a short while, it was a beautiful one.
Russell Brand
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As a performer, I'm very, very confident in what I do.
Russell Brand
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The one measure of true love is: you can insult the other. --Slavoj Zizek
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I think, you're not blagging me on this ridiculous journey, with this bit of paper. I think if you want to change things, it's not with an X on a piece of paper, it's with an X on someone's forehead.
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I don't see why someone should lose their life just so you can have a snack.
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It was crushingly disappointing as a fan of The Simpsons to discover that it's just you in a room speaking into a microphone. I thought I was going to become friends with Homer Simpson, but unfortunately none of them are real.
Russell Brand
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I've always been a 'your parents have got to come up to the school' type of person. Even now, when I do something wrong - if I say something inappropriate on a live tv show, for example - I half expect to have to deliver a note to Barbara Brand: 'Please come up to Channel 4 head office, Russell's done something despicable.
Russell Brand
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For me happiness occurs arbitrarily: a moment of eye contact on a bus, where all at once you fall in love or a frozen second in a park where it's enough that there are trees in the world.
Russell Brand
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If you have no brothers and sisters it defines you for life even when you're thirty you refer to yourself as an only child.
Russell Brand
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The more people who have access to this vital information the better society will be.
Russell Brand
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If love is something you cherish, it is hard to glean much joy from death, even in one's enemies.
Russell Brand
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I missed him, of course, but sometimes close friendships have a tidal beat that pulls you towards different shores though the ocean that connects you remains.
Russell Brand
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Even as a junkie I stayed true [to vegetarianism] - 'I shall have heroin, but I shan't have a hamburger.' What a sexy little paradox.
Russell Brand
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Democracy is a gleaming Excalibur - let's not use it just to mend the toaster.
Russell Brand
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I do have a regard for the musicality of language that came from BBC sitcoms like 'Fawlty Towers.'
Russell Brand
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As a producer, you've got to be involved in helping out with solving problems.
Russell Brand