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Over the road there was a church: a modern gray building, which constantly played a recording of church bells. Strange it was. Why no proper bells? I never went in but I bet it was a robot church for androids, where the Bible was in binary and their Jesus had laser eyes and metal claws.

Russell Brand

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Russell Brand
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: June 4
Actor
Autobiographer
Blogger
Columnist
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Guitarist
Journalist
Musician
Novelist
Playwright
Poet
Grays
Essex
Russell Edward Brand
Never
Building
Recording
Laser
Strange
Bells
Lasers
Modern
Gray
Binary
Went
Proper
Robot
Eyes
Constantly
Claws
Church
Bible
Robots
Eye
Played
Metal
Jesus
Road
Metals
Androids

More quotes by Russell Brand

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If you're a drug addict, then you've always got drugs, so you're a criminal. So you're gonna get into problems.
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It would have been convenient to be gay. Just because of the grooming, the narcissism, stuff like that. But I have this kind of roaring heterosexuality. Traditional, uncomplicated heterosexuality, an almost cliched Robin Askwith thing.
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I also do a lot of Kundalini yoga.
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The greatest poverty one can have is to be poor in one's heart and for falling in love, he is truly happy. He discovers purpose.
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Murderers! Stop murdering. Everyone will die eventually. Just sit down and be patient.
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Imagine the wisdom to be passed down from the classical Buddhist texts.
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Sometimes, as a comedian, a line will come to you, that is so beautiful, so perfect, that you think: I did not create this line. This line belongs to all of us. Surely this is a line of God
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Normally, I'm good at first dates, 'cause that's the only date I ever have, so I know how to control it and be confident.
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I do transcendental meditation, which is, I suppose, derived from Vedic or Ayurvedic principles, which is sort of Hindu principles.
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I missed him, of course, but sometimes close friendships have a tidal beat that pulls you towards different shores though the ocean that connects you remains.
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Today's 'Sesame Street' will NOT be brought to you by the number 34 or the letter D.
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No one shuts their laptop after looking at pornography and says, 'What a productive time I just spent connecting with the world!'
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Everyone has their own mantra.
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I didn't cross the line, you drew it in after I traversed it.
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It is 10 years since I used drugs or drank alcohol and my life has improved immeasurably. I have a job, a house, a cat, good friendships and generally a bright outlook.
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It's no wonder Bob Geldof knows so much about famine - he's been dining out on I Don't Like Mondays for 30 years.
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Strength does not have to be belligerent and loud.
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Surfing should be called foam-choking or sea stabbing.
Russell Brand
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People have always said, are you gay? I've had a lot of that. But it's just not in me. I really like women a lot I'm repulsed by men sexually.
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Even as a junkie I stayed true [to vegetarianism] - 'I shall have heroin, but I shan't have a hamburger.' What a sexy little paradox.
Russell Brand