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Caution: These verses may be hazardous to your solemnity.

Russell Baker

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Russell Baker
Age: 93 †
Born: 1925
Born: August 14
Died: 2019
Died: January 21
Autobiographer
Journalist
Writer
Morrisonville
Virginia
Russell Wayne Baker
Hazardous
Solemnity
Caution
Verses
May

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There are no liberals behind steering wheels.
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Ireland really is my problem the breaking point of the huge suppuration which all British and all European society now is
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A person whose job is deep thinking about atomic war would no more call a 'megadeath' a 'million corpses' than an embalmer would refer to a 'loved one' as a 'stiff.'
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The American press has the blues. Too many authorities have assured it that its days are numbered, too many good newspapers are in ruins.
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Humans treat time as a map and always know where they are located on it and respond with the appropriate emotion.
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Serious journalism need not be solemn.
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There are good reasons why everybody should heed politicians' advise not to believe the media. One of the best is that the media report what politicians say.
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A day spent praising the earth and lamenting man's pollutionist history makes you feel like a superior, sensitive soul.
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I frankly admit to not knowing who I am. This is why I refuse to buy clothes that will tell people who I want them to think I am.
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What sweeter words can fall on the human ear? It's going to be May all week long.
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The best discussion of trouble in boardroom and business office is found in newspapers' own financial pages and speeches by journalists in management jobs.
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Anticipating that most poetry will be worse than carrying heavy luggage through O'Hare Airport, the public, to its loss, reads very little of it.
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It was Queen Elizabeth who made me a foreign correspondent.
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Children rarely want to know who their parents were before they were parents, and when age finally stirs their curiosity, there is no parent left to tell them.
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Like all young reporters - brilliant or hopelessly incompetent - I dreamed of the glamorous life of the foreign correspondent: prowling Vienna in a Burberry trench coat, speaking a dozen languages to dangerous women, narrowly escaping Sardinian bandits - the usual stuff that newspaper dreams are made of.
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Skinny women don't enjoy being told they're skinny nowadays. They enjoy telling you how they got that way, as though starvation were an achievement.
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The charm of television entertainment is its ability to bridge the chasm between dinner and bedtime without mental distraction.
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Television was the most revolutionary event of the century. Its importance was in a class with the discovery of gunpowder and the invention of the printing press, which changed the human condition for centuries afterward.
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After that [father's death] I never cried with any real conviction, nor expected much of anyone's God except indifference, nor loved deeply without fear that it would cost me dearly in pain. At the age of five I had become a skeptic and began to sense that any happiness that came my way might be the prelude to some grim cosmic joke.
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Skins tanned to the consistency of well-traveled alligator suitcases.
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