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two things do me in: one's chocolate cake, the other's hypocrisy.
Roseanne Barr
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Roseanne Barr
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: November 3
Actress
Blogger
Film Actor
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Salt Lake City
Utah
Roseanne Arnold
Roseanne Thomas
Roseanne Cherrie Barr
Roseanne
Cake
Chocolate
Two
Things
Hypocrisy
More quotes by Roseanne Barr
You can really learn from Donahue. I didn't know you could be a woman in a man's body. You go out and you can't parallel park.
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My family were hitters. If you made them laugh, they didn't hit you. My dad wouldn't hit me if I got him with humor right between the eyes.
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I call myself a 'domestic goddess.
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Birth control that really works - every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids.
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It's the Night of the Living Dead. It's scary out here.
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I loved comedy all my life. I think it's a real powerful art form.
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You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you're married to a couch that burps.
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I am an observant Jew! Now my secret is out.
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I used to want to be a movie star so I wouldn't have to live in trailers anymore. And now that I make movies, I spend a lot of my life living in trailers.
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The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.
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Being hated and hunted and blamed for your own suffering makes people kind of testy, nervous, and on edge, and often fundamentalist and extreme. Bombs get thrown only when people cannot honestly talk together.
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I meditate so I know how to find a peaceful place within to be calm and peaceful.
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I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what I wrote.
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You must never be afraid in New York City, because then you will call bad stuff to you and you will not like it there.
Roseanne Barr
The only options open for girls then were of course mother, secretary or teacher. At least that's what we all thought and were preparing ourselves for. Now, I must say how lucky we are, as women, to live in an age where 'Dental Hygienist' has been added to the list.
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My kids were completely out of control, while I was working fifteen hours a day plus weekends. I screamed a lot, something I'm not particularly proud of, but it was that or firearms.
Roseanne Barr
I will outlaw bullshit. After the passage of this law the patriarchy will inevitably start to crumble as will the concept of war itself which is largely a large load of bullshit.
Roseanne Barr
I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny.
Roseanne Barr
I want to be the girl in Indiana Jones. I would love to do an adventure movie where I was saving the world. It might be cool if I used a lot of kitchen tools to fight off the enemy.
Roseanne Barr
I actually get more conservative when I'm in Vegas.
Roseanne Barr
