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I call myself a 'domestic goddess.
Roseanne Barr
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Roseanne Barr
Age: 71
Born: 1952
Born: November 3
Actress
Blogger
Film Actor
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Salt Lake City
Utah
Roseanne Arnold
Roseanne Thomas
Roseanne Cherrie Barr
Roseanne
Housewife
Goddess
Domestic
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More quotes by Roseanne Barr
I loved comedy all my life. I think it's a real powerful art form.
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I like facts and data because they help me think clearly, beyond the cultural messages that I ingest unwittingly, and sometimes find myself regurgitating almost unconsciously.
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Most of the books call Her a He, but I am able to ascertain what is meant, despite that semantic error.
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You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you're married to a couch that burps.
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I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house.
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I always felt that it was easier to take a funny person and teach them to write television than to take somebody who was a television writer and make them funny.
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Everything on this earth right now is about labor and slavery. War is the only American export left that anyone wants to buy.
Roseanne Barr
I have a huge crush on President George W. Bush. I saw him at a recent fundraiser, and he`s a babe. He`s got that Ronald Reagan charm. I think he`s hot. I respect his wife, but if he wasn`t married I`d be putting on my cowboy boots and coming around.
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You know, I'm blessed. 'Blessed' is a better way of saying 'rich.'
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My best friend Linda is leaving her husband just because he is unfaithful to her. That is no reason to leave the person. I feel like after that, you should stay with them and make sure that the rest of their life is sheer hell.
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Husbands are never happy. My husband asked me for more space, so I locked him out of the house.
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My kids were completely out of control, while I was working fifteen hours a day plus weekends. I screamed a lot, something I'm not particularly proud of, but it was that or firearms.
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Illiteracy is a huge problem in America. One in three adults in our country is illiterate.
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My grandmother ... came here, not only like so many others because of the streets 'being paved with gold' and all, but because she wanted to leave the place where the streets were paved with people who had not gone to America.
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I was raised on government cheese. As an adult, in my first marriage, my husband and I worked real hard just to go bankrupt. I happened to write some jokes about it. I did real well for myself.
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I always had a dissociative disorder. But I healed from it over the course of 14 years of big-time therapy. But, you know, I mean, everybody's kind of loony now. So I was kind of a pioneer in the mental illness thing, too.
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Why have I been chosen to deliver the message of female intelligence and its divinity to a deaf world of males? I have asked my god that question and She answered, 'Hey, why not you Roseanne?' Indeed, why not each of us?
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Meditation state is a place of deep relaxation where you can pinpoint the things you do and to set a paradigm switch from effect to cause. So how to be a cause in your own life.
Roseanne Barr
Your body is your instrument, you play it expertly.
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I'm a comic, and I'm supposed to outrage and make people laugh, Part of makin' people laugh is to shake up their thinkin'. That's what I came here to do.
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