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I always had a dissociative disorder. But I healed from it over the course of 14 years of big-time therapy. But, you know, I mean, everybody's kind of loony now. So I was kind of a pioneer in the mental illness thing, too.
Roseanne Barr
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Roseanne Barr
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: November 3
Actress
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Television Producer
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Salt Lake City
Utah
Roseanne Arnold
Roseanne Thomas
Roseanne Cherrie Barr
Roseanne
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More quotes by Roseanne Barr
US needs to fix up it's election system so that votes are fairly counted, and the Electoral College is removed.
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There is no scarier chasm of darkness than the human mind.
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Birth control that really works - every night before we go to bed we spend an hour with our kids.
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I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what I wrote.
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I've never done anything for money, and that is why I got money. When you do stuff for money, you never get money.
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I like to get people talking. I am a provocateur, and I do like getting on Twitter and riling people up. You know what, after a while some sane dialogue and sane conclusions come of that kind of thing.
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I had - after I sang the 'Star Spangled Banner' so badly, after my tragic singing accident, after that, you know, all my stuff kind of, like, really got even more full blown and, you know, I got stage fright and, you know, I couldn't do stand-up anymore and let alone sing and all the other things.
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A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him. And then you gotta get rid of all that macho crap that they pick up from beer commercials. And then there's my personal favorite, the male ego.
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I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house.
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Oh, hi. I been married thirteen years, and lemme tell you, it's a thrill to be out of the house. I never get out of the house. I stay home all the time. I never do anything fun 'cause I'm a housewife. I hate the word housewife. I prefer to be called domestic goddess.
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Legalize hemp and allow women to grow it and make food, clothing and housing for pennies from it and legalize marijuana too. Let women integrate their divided consciousness with a natural herb instead of doctors' pills that kill the liver.
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If you spend all your time worrying about dying, living isn't going to be much fun.
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The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.
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I have great parents, and they both taught me great things, but my formative years were boundaryless.
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I'm not upset about my divorce. I'm only upset that I'm not a widow.
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Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.
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The only options open for girls then were of course mother, secretary or teacher. At least that's what we all thought and were preparing ourselves for. Now, I must say how lucky we are, as women, to live in an age where 'Dental Hygienist' has been added to the list.
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I want to eat, cook, meet famous people and make fun of them.
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A lot of people in television who've had successful shows claim the 'Roseanne' show as their starting place, and I'm really proud of that.
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