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They've said 'Roseanne's nuts' for years, and now I'm going to make that a reality - I'm all about nuts now, macadamia nuts!
Roseanne Barr
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Roseanne Barr
Age: 71
Born: 1952
Born: November 3
Actress
Blogger
Film Actor
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Salt Lake City
Utah
Roseanne Arnold
Roseanne Thomas
Roseanne Cherrie Barr
Roseanne
Reality
Going
Years
Make
Nuts
More quotes by Roseanne Barr
Have you heard about the women who stabbed her husband 37 times? I admire her restraint.
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You know, I'm blessed. 'Blessed' is a better way of saying 'rich.'
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Most of the books call Her a He, but I am able to ascertain what is meant, despite that semantic error.
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I'm so much more famous than I am financially successful.
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Why have I been chosen to deliver the message of female intelligence and its divinity to a deaf world of males? I have asked my god that question and She answered, 'Hey, why not you Roseanne?' Indeed, why not each of us?
Roseanne Barr
My best friend Linda is leaving her husband just because he is unfaithful to her. That is no reason to leave the person. I feel like after that, you should stay with them and make sure that the rest of their life is sheer hell.
Roseanne Barr
Patriarchy is impotent and qualitatively unable to solve even the most simple problems in the cosmos such as picking up their own socks or placing a carton of milk back in the refrigerator after drinking from it.
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My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants and a T-shirt with two fat women fighting over a skinny guy.
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A good man doesn't just happen. They have to be created by us women. A guy is a lump like this doughnut.
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There isn't a problem on this earth that a doughnut cannot make better.
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I think I should be here alone to rethink the world, I do. I want these lesser humans gone.
Roseanne Barr
If you spend all your time worrying about dying, living isn't going to be much fun.
Roseanne Barr
I loved comedy all my life. I think it's a real powerful art form.
Roseanne Barr
It's the Night of the Living Dead. It's scary out here.
Roseanne Barr
Oh, hi. I been married thirteen years, and lemme tell you, it's a thrill to be out of the house. I never get out of the house. I stay home all the time. I never do anything fun 'cause I'm a housewife. I hate the word housewife. I prefer to be called domestic goddess.
Roseanne Barr
My kids were completely out of control, while I was working fifteen hours a day plus weekends. I screamed a lot, something I'm not particularly proud of, but it was that or firearms.
Roseanne Barr
The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.
Roseanne Barr
A lot of times nerds are really artists listening to the beat of another drummer.
Roseanne Barr
I never do anything fun, because I'm a housewife. I hate that word 'housewife.' I prefer to be called 'domestic goddess.'
Roseanne Barr
I'm fat and proud of it. If someone asks me how my diet is going, I say 'Fine - how was your lobotomy?'
Roseanne Barr