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I always was a writer, but then I wanted to do stand-up because I thought that was a way that I could perform what I wrote.

Roseanne Barr

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Roseanne Barr
Age: 72
Born: 1952
Born: November 3
Actress
Blogger
Film Actor
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Salt Lake City
Utah
Roseanne Arnold
Roseanne Thomas
Roseanne Cherrie Barr
Roseanne
Wanted
Way
Always
Perform
Wrote
Writer
Stand
Thought

More quotes by Roseanne Barr

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I want to be the girl in Indiana Jones. I would love to do an adventure movie where I was saving the world. It might be cool if I used a lot of kitchen tools to fight off the enemy.
Roseanne Barr
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If you spend all your time worrying about dying, living isn't going to be much fun.
Roseanne Barr
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politics and religion in the United States work like the twin grips of a pair of pliers on a critical mass of the masses.
Roseanne Barr
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I don't really want to hang out with politicians. I'd rather go straight to hell, and not collect $200.
Roseanne Barr
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I actually get more conservative when I'm in Vegas.
Roseanne Barr
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The basic thing is, people want to get paid, so they'll say the things that get them paid, in entertainment or politics.
Roseanne Barr
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Who's elk horn do I have to blow in order to get something to eat around here?
Roseanne Barr
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I try to tell people to keep having hope. It's always what you don't know and don't expect that's gonna be so great.
Roseanne Barr
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A good man doesn't just happen. They have to be created by us women. A guy is a lump like this doughnut.
Roseanne Barr
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Any Hamas or Zionist type who tries to interfere with the labor unions and grab the money will be marched to the guillotines and subsequently beheaded. And isn't that easier and more productive than some endless, bloody conflict? So sayeth the gospel of common sense. Happy Mother's Day.
Roseanne Barr
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I loved comedy all my life. I think it's a real powerful art form.
Roseanne Barr
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My best friend Linda is leaving her husband just because he is unfaithful to her. That is no reason to leave the person. I feel like after that, you should stay with them and make sure that the rest of their life is sheer hell.
Roseanne Barr
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Honestly, a lot of the human etiquette I learned in life I learned from, like, thank-you notes and dating Jimmy Kimmel.
Roseanne Barr
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I'm so much more famous than I am financially successful.
Roseanne Barr
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I like to get people talking. I am a provocateur, and I do like getting on Twitter and riling people up. You know what, after a while some sane dialogue and sane conclusions come of that kind of thing.
Roseanne Barr
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I've never done anything for money, and that is why I got money. When you do stuff for money, you never get money.
Roseanne Barr
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We're not meant to be parents when we're 50.
Roseanne Barr
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The end of my addiction to fame happened at the exact moment Roseanne dropped out of the top ten, in the seventh of our nine seasons. It was mysteriously instantaneous!
Roseanne Barr
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I think that all comics or humorists, or whatever we are, ask questions. That's what we're supposed to do. But I not only ask the questions, I offer solutions.
Roseanne Barr
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You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you're married to a couch that burps.
Roseanne Barr