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You can't ride home on a bowl of goat.

Ron White

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Ron White
Age: 68
Born: 1956
Born: December 18
Actor
Politician
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Fritch
Texas
Ronald Dee White
Goat
Goats
Bowl
Bowls
Ride
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More quotes by Ron White

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I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.
Ron White
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I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
Ron White
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You can't fix stupid. There's not a pill you can take, or a class you can go to.
Ron White
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I have had a front row seat to observe Darren's success over the last few years and never fully knew the keys to his achievement. He has unselfishly revealed his secrets with The Compound Effect so that others can learn from his success. In my eyes, it is more valuable than gold!
Ron White
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I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine.
Ron White
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When life hands you lemons make lemonade. Then find someone who's life gave them Tequila and have a party.
Ron White
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I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.
Ron White
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From the very beginning I started with a beer and a cigarette because I couldn't figure out what to do with my hands. So usually I have a beer and cigarette and that's what I was doing with my hands because that looked natural and felt good.
Ron White
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The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another learning disability I can't even spell. I don't even have a high school diploma. I'm smart, but you can't prove it on paper.
Ron White
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If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.
Ron White
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The next time you have a thought... let it go.
Ron White
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You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.
Ron White
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I don't even plan things until later, so no I got no plans.
Ron White
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Years ago, while I was watching a baseball game between the Baltimore Orioles and the Texas Rangers, I remember staring in awe at Cal Ripken. I realized during this game that 'you don't have to be flashy' or have 'power numbers' to be great. It's about the simple things that are the hard things. It's about leadership, work ethic and commitment.
Ron White
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I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
Ron White
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I don't do any corporate work.
Ron White
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I didn't get where I am today by worryin' about how I'd feel tomorrow.
Ron White
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Naw, man, I like big, hard, throbbing co- (stunned pause) ...I did not know that about myself.
Ron White
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When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
Ron White
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I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
Ron White