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The hardest that I've laughed at a movie was probably Team America. I laughed 'til I thought I was just gonna throw up. I almost had to turn it off.
Ron White
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Ron White
Age: 67
Born: 1956
Born: December 18
Actor
Politician
Songwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Fritch
Texas
Ronald Dee White
Team
Probably
Movie
Almost
Laughed
Turns
Throw
Thought
Hardest
America
Gonna
Turn
More quotes by Ron White
In my Comedy Club sets, I just work on what is fresh and try to build that show as long as I can. I don't like to do burnt material on stage. Even though my crowd loves to hear me do old stuff, I don't like to do old stuff.
Ron White
You can only do two things with your life: give it away or throw it away.
Ron White
I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.
Ron White
I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.
Ron White
I do live like a rock star, but it's not as great as it sounds. It's a lot of traveling.
Ron White
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
Ron White
You can't ride home on a bowl of goat.
Ron White
I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.
Ron White
You can't fix stupid.
Ron White
I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
Ron White
I don't even plan things until later, so no I got no plans.
Ron White
We have hearing aids in order to fix our ears. We have lasik surgery in order to fix our eyes. People ... you can't fix stupid!
Ron White
Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
Ron White
You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.
Ron White
The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another learning disability I can't even spell. I don't even have a high school diploma. I'm smart, but you can't prove it on paper.
Ron White
If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.
Ron White
You can't fix stupid. There's not a pill you can take, or a class you can go to.
Ron White
It's something that's really fun to do. It's a family business.
Ron White
I have had a front row seat to observe Darren's success over the last few years and never fully knew the keys to his achievement. He has unselfishly revealed his secrets with The Compound Effect so that others can learn from his success. In my eyes, it is more valuable than gold!
Ron White
From the very beginning I started with a beer and a cigarette because I couldn't figure out what to do with my hands. So usually I have a beer and cigarette and that's what I was doing with my hands because that looked natural and felt good.
Ron White
