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I told my dentist I want a tooth to match the others. He gave my one with four cavities.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Match
Teeth
Gave
Told
Four
Others
Cavities
Tooth
Dentist
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I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
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What a dog I got, he found out we look alike, so he killed himself.
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I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is don't tell the butcher!
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I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, Are you going to hate yourself in the morning? She said, No, I hate myself now.
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I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
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My father gave me a bat for Christmas. The first time I tried to play with it, it flew away.
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At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me !
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What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!
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At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
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I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.
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Man, who don't like spaghetti?
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Life is full of temporary situations, ultimately ending in a permanent solution.
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Comedy is a camouflage for depression.
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I was making love to my wife the other night, I looked up. She was on the phone.
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When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
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I joined gamblers anon., they gave me 2 to 1 I wouldn't make it! I joined AA, there was a two drink minimum!
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Hey, did somebody step on a duck?
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