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With girls I get no respect. A belly dancer told me I turned her stomach.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Dancer
Stomach
Turned
Girls
Respect
Told
Girl
Belly
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
Life is full of temporary situations, ultimately ending in a permanent solution.
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When I go to a nude beach, I always take a ruler, just in case I have to prove something.
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I asked my wife if she would put out the garbage. she said why should I you never put out for me.
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Boy is my wife stupid. It takes her and hour and a half to watch 60 minutes. My daughters no bargain either. In public school she was voted most likely to conceive.
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I can't get no respect.
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My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
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It's great to have gray hair. Ask anyone who's bald.
Rodney Dangerfield
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.
Rodney Dangerfield
I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin.
Rodney Dangerfield
He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.
Rodney Dangerfield
She was so ugly that her face could stop a sundial.
Rodney Dangerfield
I recently had double-bypass surgery. As they wheel you in, the doctor always gives you a last look. You know that look. That look of confidence to make you feel good. I always say to every doctor, If I don't make it, I'll never know it.
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I tell ya, southern people, they always think you are hard-of-hearing. Every timr you leave they say to you, You come back, you hear? And southern people, they think you are horny too. You get directions, they say, Just up the road apiece.
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Dad told me to stop running in circles, I couldn't, so he nailed down my other foot!
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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield
With my old man I got no respect. I asked him, How can I get my kite in the air? He told me to run off a cliff.
Rodney Dangerfield
Life is just a bowl of pits.
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If you could learn to make love, I could fire the chauffer.
Rodney Dangerfield
To give you an idea how well I was doing at the time I quit, I was the only one who knew I quit.
Rodney Dangerfield
When I was a kid I got no respect. When I went on the roller coaster, my old man told me to stand up straight.
Rodney Dangerfield
