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When I told my wife she was lousy in bed - she went out - she got a second opinion.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Went
Wife
Opinion
Lousy
Bed
Second
Told
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
My wife has to be the worst cook. I don't believe meatloaf should glow in the dark
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.
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Cars and women are a lot alike. They lie about the milage.
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He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.
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I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the west.
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My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
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My wife has teeth like the stars... they come out at night.
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My wife is so fat that the last time I saw something that big it was grazing.
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I had a date with an inflatable girl. Now I got an inflatable guy looking for me.
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I don't get no respect. I called Suicide Prevention. They tried to talk me into it.
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I told my wife a man is like wine, he gets better with age. She locked me in the cellar.
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School is a place were you go to eat your lunch
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She was so ugly that her face could stop a sundial.
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At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
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My wife made me join a bridge club... I jump off next Tuesday.
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I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
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My car broke down just the other day, I called triple A, they came and towed me away!
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Oh, when I was a kid in show business I was poor. I used to go to orgies to eat the grapes.
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It's great to have gray hair. Ask anyone who's bald.
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I am the world's oldest teenager. I've never lost my youthful attitude.
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