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Man, who don't like spaghetti?

Rodney Dangerfield

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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Spaghetti
Men
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More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

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Me and my dad used to play tag, he'd drive!
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When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's.
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My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.
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A sense of humor is rare. It isn't telling a joke about how there are three ways to get to heaven. It's being in a restaurant and hearing someone say, Everyone's got their tale of woe, and then turning around and saying, Unfortunately, in life, there's more woe than tail.
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They took a survey: Why do men get up in the middle of the night? Ten percent get up to go to the bathroom and 90 percent get up to go home.
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Dad told me to stop running in circles, I couldn't, so he nailed down my other foot!
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The other night a mugger took off his mask and made me wear it.
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my wifes cooking is so bad the flys fix our screens
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When I was a kid, I never went to Disneyland. My ol' man told me Mickey Mouse died in a cancer experiment.
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You live with life's disappointments and learn from them. At seventy-eight, I know it all.
Rodney Dangerfield
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I bought a perfect second car... a tow truck.
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My wife has to be the worst cook. In my house, we pray after we eat.
Rodney Dangerfield
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My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.
Rodney Dangerfield
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I'm getting so old my insurance company sends me 1/2 a calendar!
Rodney Dangerfield
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My wife can't cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
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Well with girls I don't get no respect. I had a blind date. I waited two hours on the corner. A girl walked by. I said Are you Louise? She said, Are you Rodney? I said, Yeah. She said, I'm not Louise.
Rodney Dangerfield
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My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
Rodney Dangerfield
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We learned sexual technique from our dog. He taught how to beg, and he taught my wife how to roll over and play dead.
Rodney Dangerfield
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I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.
Rodney Dangerfield
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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
Rodney Dangerfield