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If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Piggy
Beholder
Ugliness
Liberating
Beauty
Eye
Beautiful
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
We learned sexual technique from our dog. He taught how to beg, and he taught my wife how to roll over and play dead.
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I figured out I'm bisexual. I have sex twice a year.
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Group sex, are you kidding, I had group sex - my wife screwed in front of the jury.
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Last year my birthday cake looked like a prairie fire.
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I told my kids, Someday, you'll have kids of your own. One of them said, So will you.
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My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
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With my wife I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it.
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My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
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My mother used to rock me - and she used big rocks.
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He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.
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I was making love to my wife the other night, I looked up. She was on the phone.
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I bought a perfect second car... a tow truck.
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When it comes to sex, at my age I like threesomes. In case one of us dies.
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I was an ugly kid when I was born, after the doctor cut the cord, he hung himself.
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I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is don't tell the butcher!
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My wife is so fat that the last time I saw something that big it was grazing.
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I'll tell you one thing, I know how to satisfy my wife in bed, yeah, I leave.
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I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.
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You know you're old when your family talk about you in front of you. What are we going to do with Pop? We have company tonight.
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I bought a new book, '100 new ways to make love'. I ended up in traction - it was a misprint.
Rodney Dangerfield
