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I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Right
Supporting
Fighter
Save
Tough
Wife
Tell
Buck
Mother
Fighters
Two
Bucks
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, Are you going to hate yourself in the morning? She said, No, I hate myself now.
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I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
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I told my wife a man is like wine, he gets better with age. She locked me in the cellar.
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They say love thy neighbor as thy self , what am I supposed to do jerk him off too?
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Group sex, are you kidding, I had group sex - my wife screwed in front of the jury.
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She was so fat that her bathtub has stretch marks.
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I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
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I got myself good this morning too. I did my pushups in the nude, I didn't see the mouse trap.
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My kids scotch tape worms to the sidewalk and watch the birds get hernias.
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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
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To give you an idea how well I was doing at the time I quit, I was the only one who knew I quit.
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One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.
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You know you're old when your family talk about you in front of you. What are we going to do with Pop? We have company tonight.
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Oh, I was an ugly kid. My old man took me to the zoo. They thanked him for returning me.
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When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
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I once dated a girl that was wild. She was so wild that one night she gave her phone number to the mechanical bull.
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This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
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My old man never liked me. He gave me my allowance in traveler's checks.
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Life is just a bowl of pits.
Rodney Dangerfield
My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
Rodney Dangerfield
