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We were poor. we were so poor, in my neighborhood the rainbow was in black-and-white.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Rainbow
Neighborhood
Poor
White
Black
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push.
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Last time I tried to make love to my wife nothing happened, so I said to her, 'What's the matter, you can't think of anybody either?'
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The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.
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I've never been lucky. The day my ship came in, I was at the airport.
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A man in the crowd asks: Hey Rodney, how'd you get started? Rodney: I was 12 years old, alone in my room, and I got started!
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I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin.
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I'll tell you one thing, I know how to satisfy my wife in bed, yeah, I leave.
Rodney Dangerfield
I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
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My wife has teeth like the stars... they come out at night.
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I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
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Don't talk about yourself so much...we'll do that when you leave.
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And my girlfriend, she's FAT! How fat? She's so fat she wears two watches-one for each time zone!
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His breath is so bad why every time he smokes he blows onion rings.
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I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.
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When we got married my wife told me I was one in a million. I found out she was right.
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My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.
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This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
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When I was forty, I was getting divorced, living in a low-class, dirty hotel in New York. My mother was dying of cancer. I owed $20,000. That was about the lowest. I came back to show business, and I couldn't get a job. I was turned down by every small-time agent in New York.
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When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's.
Rodney Dangerfield
I can't get no respect.
Rodney Dangerfield
