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I figured out I'm bisexual. I have sex twice a year.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Twice
Sex
Year
Years
Bisexual
Figured
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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School is a place were you go to eat your lunch
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One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.
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My son's an idiot. He sprained his ankle playing golf. He fell off the ballwasher.
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I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the west.
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A girl phoned me the other day and said... 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. Nobody was home.
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What a childhood I had. Once on my birthday my ol' man gave me a bat. The first day I played with it, it flew away.
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I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
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When we got married my wife told me I was one in a million. I found out she was right.
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Oh, when I was a kid, I was poor. Christmas, I got no presents. Well, there was one Christmas, on our front lawn - Prancer and Dancer - they dropped off a little something.
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I like to date schoolteachers. If you do something wrong, they make you do it over again.
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Life is just a bowl of pits.
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I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.
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I asked my wife if she would put out the garbage. she said why should I you never put out for me.
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I don't get no respect
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If you could learn to make love, I could fire the chauffer.
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What a childhood I had. My parents sent me to a child psychiatrist. The kid didn't help me at all.
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My wife says 90% of sex occurs between the ears. But I need a girl who can blow more just my mind.
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I bought a perfect second car... a tow truck.
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When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's.
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