Quote

Well with girls I don't get no respect. I had a blind date. I waited two hours on the corner. A girl walked by. I said Are you Louise? She said, Are you Rodney? I said, Yeah. She said, I'm not Louise.

Rodney Dangerfield

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Wells
Corners
Well
Blind
Girls
Rodney
Yeah
Louise
Respect
Waited
Hours
Walked
Girl
Date
Two
Corner

More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

Image
I tell ya, my wife's a lousy cook. After dinner, I don't brush my teeth. I count them.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My wife says 90% of sex occurs between the ears. But I need a girl who can blow more just my mind.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I have three kids, one of each.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
One day as I came home early, I saw a man jogging naked. I said to the guy, 'Hey, buddy, why are you doing that?' He said, 'Because you came home early.'
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I told my dentist I want a tooth to match the others. He gave my one with four cavities.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My cousin is gay, I always tell him that in our family tree, he's in the fruit section.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
She was so fat that her belly button makes an echo.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
With my dog I don't get no respect. He keeps barking at the front door. He don't want to go out. He wants me to leave.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
When I was a kid, I never went to Disneyland. My ol' man told me Mickey Mouse died in a cancer experiment.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I am the world's oldest teenager. I've never lost my youthful attitude.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Group sex, are you kidding, I had group sex - my wife screwed in front of the jury.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Never guess your wife's size. Just buy anything marked petite and hold on to the receipt.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Time and tide and hookers wait for no man.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
She was so ugly that her face could stop a sundial.
Rodney Dangerfield