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She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Humor
Failed
Four
Test
Funny
Tests
Learn
Fronts
Used
Lessons
Front
Seat
Couldn
Drivers
Took
Seats
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I told my wife a man is like wine, he gets better with age. She locked me in the cellar.
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One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.
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I said to a girl I'd been seeing, come home with me, honey, and I'll show you where it's at. She said, You'd better, because the last time I could'nt find it.
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At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me !
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When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, We want five thousand dollars or you'll see your kid again.
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A hooker once told me she had a headache.
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My only thrill is self inflicted hickies.
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He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.
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I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
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