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A man in the crowd asks: Hey Rodney, how'd you get started? Rodney: I was 12 years old, alone in my room, and I got started!
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Men
Room
Humor
Rooms
Started
Alone
Rodney
Asks
Hey
Funny
Crowd
Years
Crowds
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
When it comes to sex, at my age I like threesomes. In case one of us dies.
Rodney Dangerfield
I was an ugly kid when I was born, after the doctor cut the cord, he hung himself.
Rodney Dangerfield
Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, Where'd you get the pig? Guy says, This is a duck. Bartender says, I was talking to the duck.
Rodney Dangerfield
She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.
Rodney Dangerfield
My old man never liked me. He gave me my allowance in traveler's checks.
Rodney Dangerfield
With my dog I don't get no respect. He keeps barking at the front door. He don't want to go out. He wants me to leave.
Rodney Dangerfield
My cousin is gay, in school while other kids were dissecting frog, he was opening flies.
Rodney Dangerfield
I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield
I have three kids, one of each.
Rodney Dangerfield
My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
Rodney Dangerfield
You live with life's disappointments and learn from them. At seventy-eight, I know it all.
Rodney Dangerfield
When I was forty, I was getting divorced, living in a low-class, dirty hotel in New York. My mother was dying of cancer. I owed $20,000. That was about the lowest. I came back to show business, and I couldn't get a job. I was turned down by every small-time agent in New York.
Rodney Dangerfield
I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.
Rodney Dangerfield
One time my whole family played hide and seek. They found my mother in Pittsburgh!
Rodney Dangerfield
I asked him Who said you could fool around with my wife he said everybody.
Rodney Dangerfield
My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
Rodney Dangerfield
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
Rodney Dangerfield
I come home from work early one day, and I see a guy jogging down the street in his underwear. I ask him, Why are you jogging in your underwear? He says, You came home from work early.
Rodney Dangerfield
I know I'm not sexy. In high school I was voted Most Likely to Masturbate.
Rodney Dangerfield
I got myself good this morning too. I did my pushups in the nude, I didn't see the mouse trap.
Rodney Dangerfield
