Quote

I can't get no respect.

Rodney Dangerfield

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Complaints
Complaining
Respect

More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield

Image
During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me… Just the other night she called me from a hotel.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Me and my dad used to play tag, he'd drive!
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I'm sitting on top of the world, and I've got hemorrhoids.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My wife is so fat that when she lays on the beach the people feel sorry for her and try to roll her back into the water.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
One day as I came home early, I saw a man jogging naked. I said to the guy, 'Hey, buddy, why are you doing that?' He said, 'Because you came home early.'
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Never guess your wife's size. Just buy anything marked petite and hold on to the receipt.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I asked my wife if she would put out the garbage. she said why should I you never put out for me.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My cousins gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
Oh, I was an ugly kid. My old man took me to the zoo. They thanked him for returning me.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I'm getting so old my insurance company sends me 1/2 a calendar!
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
I tell ya, southern people, they always think you are hard-of-hearing. Every timr you leave they say to you, You come back, you hear? And southern people, they think you are horny too. You get directions, they say, Just up the road apiece.
Rodney Dangerfield
Image
My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.
Rodney Dangerfield