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She was so fat that her bikini is made out of two bed sheets (king-size).
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Bed
King
Size
Kings
Two
Bikini
Made
Bikinis
Sheets
Fats
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
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My kids scotch tape worms to the sidewalk and watch the birds get hernias.
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My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
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I live in a bad neighborhood. Why, I saw two complete strangers share a taxi - yeah, one guy took the radio and the other guy took the tires.
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I bought a new book, '100 new ways to make love'. I ended up in traction - it was a misprint.
Rodney Dangerfield
What a dog I got. Last night he went on the paper four times - three while I was reading it.
Rodney Dangerfield
My father gave me a bat for Christmas. The first time I tried to play with it, it flew away.
Rodney Dangerfield
Me and my dad used to play tag, he'd drive!
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I told my kids, Someday, you'll have kids of your own. One of them said, So will you.
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I once had a problem ... so I tried group sex. Now I have a new problem - who to thank.
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My old man never liked me. He gave me my allowance in traveler's checks.
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It was the same thing in the army, no respect. They gave me a uniform that glowed in the dark.
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What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.
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I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.
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I'd like to get some new clothes, but I can't find a Big and Short store.
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My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
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She was so ugly that I took her to a dog show and she won first prize.
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She was so ugly that her face could stop a sundial.
Rodney Dangerfield
I got myself good this morning too. I did my pushups in the nude, I didn't see the mouse trap.
Rodney Dangerfield
