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She was so fat that her bikini is made out of two bed sheets (king-size).
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Kings
Two
Bikini
Made
Bikinis
Sheets
Fats
Bed
King
Size
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
You take care and I hope I'll run into you - when I'm driving.
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I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
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I asked him Who said you could fool around with my wife he said everybody.
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My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.
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And my girlfriend, she's FAT! How fat? She's so fat she wears two watches-one for each time zone!
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My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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What a childhood I had. Once on my birthday my ol' man gave me a bat. The first day I played with it, it flew away.
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What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!
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When I told my wife she was lousy in bed - she went out - she got a second opinion.
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I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
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When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, We want five thousand dollars or you'll see your kid again.
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My cousin is gay, in school while other kids were dissecting frog, he was opening flies.
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We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
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My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg.
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My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
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To give you an idea how well I was doing at the time I quit, I was the only one who knew I quit.
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I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
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They took a survey: Why do men get up in the middle of the night? Ten percent get up to go to the bathroom and 90 percent get up to go home.
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At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
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My wife says 90% of sex occurs between the ears. But I need a girl who can blow more just my mind.
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