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I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the west.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Great
Civil
West
Stupid
Comedy
Funny
Family
Uncle
War
Uncles
Come
Fought
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My mother used to rock me - and she used big rocks.
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Dad told me to stop running in circles, I couldn't, so he nailed down my other foot!
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Sure I smoked pot in hospital. My wife won't let me toke at home.
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My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's.
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With my dog I don't get no respect. He keeps barking at the front door. He don't want to go out. He wants me to leave.
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A hooker once told me she had a headache.
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My cousin is gay, I always tell him that in our family tree, he's in the fruit section.
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I asked my old man if I could go ice-skating on the lake. He told me, Wait til it gets warmer.
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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
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I have three kids, one of each.
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People ask if I can get it up in the morning. I tell them are you kidding I'm envious of a stiff wind.
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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.
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She was old too, when she went to school they didn't have history.
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