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Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Mouth
Mouths
Saws
Lasts
Last
Time
Like
Shack
Hook
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
Rodney Dangerfield
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
Rodney Dangerfield
I've never been lucky. The day my ship came in, I was at the airport.
Rodney Dangerfield
My wife she's fat. Why, if she lost a few pounds, she'd be perfectly round.
Rodney Dangerfield
When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, Look, twins!
Rodney Dangerfield
When I was a kid, I never went to Disneyland. My ol' man told me Mickey Mouse died in a cancer experiment.
Rodney Dangerfield
She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.
Rodney Dangerfield
I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.
Rodney Dangerfield
I tell ya, my wife was never nice. On our first date, I asked her if I could give her a goodnight kiss on the cheek - she bent over!
Rodney Dangerfield
[on 8/24/04, before entering a Los Angeles hospital for heart valve replacement surgery] If things go right, I'll be there about a week, and if things don't go right, I'll be there about an hour and a half.
Rodney Dangerfield
I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is don't tell the butcher!
Rodney Dangerfield
I went to a freak show and they let me in for nothing.
Rodney Dangerfield
I say 'no' to drugs. Whenever someone asks me for some of my drugs I say, 'no.
Rodney Dangerfield
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
It's lonely on the top when there's no one on the bottom.
Rodney Dangerfield
My only thrill is self inflicted hickies.
Rodney Dangerfield
At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me !
Rodney Dangerfield
Life is just a bowl of pits.
Rodney Dangerfield
My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
Rodney Dangerfield
My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good.
Rodney Dangerfield
