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At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Age
Seventies
Fighting
Aging
Hope
Twenty
Stills
Reform
Still
Twenties
Men
Fight
Time
Wants
Seventy
World
Full
Reformation
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
My wife says 90% of sex occurs between the ears. But I need a girl who can blow more just my mind.
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What a childhood I had. My parents sent me to a child psychiatrist. The kid didn't help me at all.
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My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
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We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
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I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is don't tell the butcher!
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I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
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I have tried a little kinky stuff. A woman called me and said, 'I have mirrors all over my bedroom. Bring a bottle.' I brought Windex.
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I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
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My sex life is terrible my wife put a mirror over the dog's bed. Actually she did put a mirror over our bed. She says she likes to watch herself laugh.
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And my girlfriend, she's FAT! How fat? She's so fat she wears two watches-one for each time zone!
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I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
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I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, Are you going to hate yourself in the morning? She said, No, I hate myself now.
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You take care and I hope I'll run into you - when I'm driving.
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I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
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One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.
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Last week my tie caught on fire, some guy tried to put it out with an axe.
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We were poor. we were so poor, in my neighborhood the rainbow was in black-and-white.
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One day as I came home early, I saw a man jogging naked. I said to the guy, 'Hey, buddy, why are you doing that?' He said, 'Because you came home early.'
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I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.
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I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
Rodney Dangerfield
