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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Wife
Butcher
Funny
Butchers
Kids
Bees
Birds
Bird
Humor
Told
Comedy
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The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.
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To give you an idea how well I was doing at the time I quit, I was the only one who knew I quit.
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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
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My wife has cut our lovemaking down to once a month, but I know two guys she's cut out entirely.
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At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
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When I told my wife she was lousy in bed - she went out - she got a second opinion.
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My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
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With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
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