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Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Every
Pyramids
Egypt
Leaves
Dog
Room
Rooms
Call
Funny
Pyramid
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
With girls I get no respect. A belly dancer told me I turned her stomach.
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My wife has to be the worst cook. I don't believe meatloaf should glow in the dark
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My wife has teeth like the stars... they come out at night.
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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
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My sex life is like shooting pool with a rope!
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A hooker once told me she had a headache.
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Sure I smoked pot in hospital. My wife won't let me toke at home.
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At certain times I like sex - like after a cigarette.
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I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
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What a childhood I had. Once on my birthday my ol' man gave me a bat. The first day I played with it, it flew away.
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You take care and I hope I'll run into you - when I'm driving.
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I was an ugly kid when I was born, after the doctor cut the cord, he hung himself.
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I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.
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I bought a new book, '100 new ways to make love'. I ended up in traction - it was a misprint.
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What a childhood I had. My parents sent me to a child psychiatrist. The kid didn't help me at all.
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She was so fat that her clothes are made by Omar the tent maker.
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One day as I came home early, I saw a man jogging naked. I said to the guy, 'Hey, buddy, why are you doing that?' He said, 'Because you came home early.'
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I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.
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One night I came home. I figured, let my wife come on. I'll play it cool. Let her make the first move. She went to Florida.
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I know I'm not sexy. In high school I was voted Most Likely to Masturbate.
Rodney Dangerfield
