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I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.
Rodney Dangerfield
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Rodney Dangerfield
Age: 82 †
Born: 1921
Born: November 22
Died: 2004
Died: October 5
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Town of Babylon
New York
Jacob Rodney Cohen
Jack Roy
Witty
Forests
Humorous
Looked
Tree
Funny
Family
Genealogy
Found
Sap
More quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
My ex-wife is a water sign and I'm an earth sign. Together we made mud.
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My only thrill is self inflicted hickies.
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My wife she's fat. Why, if she lost a few pounds, she'd be perfectly round.
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My sex life is terrible my wife put a mirror over the dog's bed. Actually she did put a mirror over our bed. She says she likes to watch herself laugh.
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I was making love to my wife the other night, I looked up. She was on the phone.
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When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, Look, twins!
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I bought a new book, '100 new ways to make love'. I ended up in traction - it was a misprint.
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All my wife and I do is fight about sex. The other night, we really had it out. Well, I'll put it this way - I had it out.
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I get no respect... I tell you, when I was born, the doctor smacked my mother
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One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.
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My car broke down just the other day, I called triple A, they came and towed me away!
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She was so fat that her bikini is made out of two bed sheets (king-size).
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This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.
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She failed her drivers test. She couldn't get used to the front seat. It took her four lessons to learn to sit up.
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My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, Where'd you get the pig? Guy says, This is a duck. Bartender says, I was talking to the duck.
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I have tried a little kinky stuff. A woman called me and said, 'I have mirrors all over my bedroom. Bring a bottle.' I brought Windex.
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I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens.
Rodney Dangerfield
I was an ugly child. I got lost on the beach. I asked a cop if he could find my parents. He said, 'I don't know. There's lots of places for them to hide'.
Rodney Dangerfield
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.
Rodney Dangerfield
