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If women ran the world there would be no wars. However every 28 days there would be some very intense negotiations.
Robin Williams
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Robin Williams
Age: 63 †
Born: 1951
Born: July 21
Died: 2014
Died: August 11
Actor
Audiobook Narrator
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Mime Artist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Robin McLaurin Williams
Days
War
Women
Negotiations
Every
Negotiation
Would
Ran
World
Wars
Intense
However
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Taking Viagra after open heart surgery is like a Civil War re-enactment with live ammo. Not good.
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Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public.
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We used to be hunter-gatherers, now we're shopper-borrowers.
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You're going to the cemetery with your toothbrush. How Egyptian
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I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.
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His golf bag does not contain a full set of irons.
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Come on now! You kick out the gooks, the next thing you know, you have to kick out the chinks, the spicks, the spooks, the kikes and all that's going to be left is a couple of brain-dead rednecks.
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Avoid using the word 'very' because it's lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don't use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason boys - to woo women - and in that endeavor, laziness will not do.
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After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was I just have fewer dents in my car.
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I only ever play Vegas one night at a time.
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Cross-country running was so beautiful with all the trails and the lake regions ... very physical and also a bit spiritual, where you could come over the mountain and all of a sudden you'd see a Buddhist landscape fog.
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The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'
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For a while you get mad, then you get over it.
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When in doubt, go for the dick joke.
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We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.
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