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Even evangelicals realize that Pinocchio's father was a carpenter too. That's the old joke.
Robin Williams
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Robin Williams
Age: 63 †
Born: 1951
Born: July 21
Died: 2014
Died: August 11
Actor
Audiobook Narrator
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Mime Artist
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Robin McLaurin Williams
Joke
Jokes
Realize
Realizing
Father
Even
Pinocchio
Evangelicals
Carpenter
More quotes by Robin Williams
Mickey Mouse to a three-year-old is a six-foot-tall RAT!
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I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.
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Just now when I said, I have a crush on you, you didn't say, no way loser. I'd rather have a lobotomy by a leper. That means something
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Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public.
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For a while you get mad, then you get over it.
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People would say I never censor. As Billy Crystal says, 'I don't have that button.'
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What's my credibility? Why are they looking to me for advice? Isn't there someone more qualified?
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I couldn't imagine living the way I used to live. Now people come up to me from the drug days and go, 'Hi, remember me?' And I'm going, 'No, did I have sex with you? Did I take a dump in your tool box?'
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It was kind of a decompression - from straight alcohol to mixed drinks to wine to spritzers - and then you're out.
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If you're going to do a movie about the Village, it's pretty nice to shoot in the village and not be in Toronto.
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People say that I'm a tree hugger, but I do a lot more than hug trees. I like having my drinking water without faecal matter, that's really nice. Or acceptable levels of strychnine. I'm an air breather, I've gotten used to that over the years.
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Here's the best birth control in the whole world, if you really, if you have no pills, if you have no diaphragm, if you have no other form of contraception. Use it for ladies, if he comes at you with that little thing in his hand, just laugh at it. They can't deal with it, OK, it'll be gone.
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If you don't keep pushing the limits, you wake up one day and you're the center square to block.
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Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.
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Women are wonderful. They're amazing creatures. You can never learn enough! They're addicting in the most amazing sense.
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The entire world will be in nuclear war, and only the Swiss will be going, 'what's that noise?'
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The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.
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You have this idea that you'd better keep working otherwise people will forget. And that was dangerous. And then you realize, no, actually if you take a break people might be more interested in you.
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I learned that by being entertaining you make a connection with another person.
Robin Williams
