Quote

They say kids today don't know the value of a dollar. They certainly do know the value of a dollar. That's why they ask for five.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Asks
Five
Values
Dollar
Kids
Dollars
Today
Certainly
Value
Modern

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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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Live your life so that if someone says 'Be yourself' it's good advice.
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A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
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I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it - after all, they've already given us tasteless bread.
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There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers.
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Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.
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I had a terrible fight with my wife on New Year's Eve. She called me a procrastinator. So I finished addressing the Christmas cards and left.
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Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.
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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
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The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
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I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, Guess Who? She's a divorce lawyer.
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If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
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To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
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It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Hong Kong its the way the egg rolls.
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Lincoln was known to have walked miles to borrow books, to get the most rudimentary form of education. So what do we do on his birthday? We close the schools!
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Individuality' is the key to success.
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