Quote

I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.

Robert Orben

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Years
Twenties
Never
Morning
Like
Year
Around
May
Feel
Unfortunately
Feels
Forty
Every
Twenty

More quotes by Robert Orben

Image
It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Hong Kong its the way the egg rolls.
Robert Orben
Image
They're combining that new fertility drug with a birth control pill for people who don't want triplets.
Robert Orben
Image
Do you realize what would happen if Moses were alive today? He'd go up to Mount Sinai, come back with the Ten Commandments, and spend the next eight years trying to get published.
Robert Orben
Image
Anybody with a good sense of humor is one-up on their competition. We respond to somebody who has the ability to make us laugh. It's a bonding influence.
Robert Orben
Image
The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.
Robert Orben
Image
It always seems to someone outside the business that it is very difficult to write for a comedy show because it must be done quickly. Actually, it is much easier to write this humor than to do a joke or a show from scratch, because the audience knows the plot. Just mention what is going on and then deliver the punch line.
Robert Orben
Image
I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it - after all, they've already given us tasteless bread.
Robert Orben
Image
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
Image
Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
Robert Orben
Image
I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
Robert Orben
Image
In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
Robert Orben
Image
A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
Robert Orben
Image
Faith, indeed, has up to the present not been able to move real mountains.... But it can put mountains where there are none. Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
Image
Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.
Robert Orben
Image
Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.
Robert Orben
Image
I had a terrible fight with my wife on New Year's Eve. She called me a procrastinator. So I finished addressing the Christmas cards and left.
Robert Orben
Image
If you can laugh together, you can work together.
Robert Orben
Image
There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
Robert Orben
Image
The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it.
Robert Orben
Image
To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Robert Orben