Quote

I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Around
May
Feel
Unfortunately
Feels
Forty
Every
Twenty
Years
Twenties
Never
Morning
Like
Year

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Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.
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To exercise is human not to is divine.
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There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
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Wait'll next year! is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!
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They're combining that new fertility drug with a birth control pill for people who don't want triplets.
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I don't want to say anything about my kids...but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
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It's amazing how important your job is when you want the day off - and how unimportant it is when you want a raise.
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Faith, indeed, has up to the present not been able to move real mountains.... But it can put mountains where there are none. Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
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A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.
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The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.
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Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.
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Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down.
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Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.
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Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
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