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The Playboy Calendar this year has some tiptop models. Any more top and they'd tip.
Robert Orben
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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Calendar
Playboy
Calendars
Models
Year
Years
More quotes by Robert Orben
Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
Robert Orben
Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, Guess Who? She's a divorce lawyer.
Robert Orben
Happiness is contagious. Be a carrier!!
Robert Orben
Wait'll next year! is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
Robert Orben
Did you ever figure to be living in a time when your check is good, but the bank bounces?
Robert Orben
To exercise is human not to is divine.
Robert Orben
It always seems to someone outside the business that it is very difficult to write for a comedy show because it must be done quickly. Actually, it is much easier to write this humor than to do a joke or a show from scratch, because the audience knows the plot. Just mention what is going on and then deliver the punch line.
Robert Orben
To reduce stress, avoid excitement. Spend more time with your spouse.
Robert Orben
I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'
Robert Orben
We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.
Robert Orben
It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Hong Kong its the way the egg rolls.
Robert Orben
Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
Robert Orben
Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
Robert Orben
They say kids today don't know the value of a dollar. They certainly do know the value of a dollar. That's why they ask for five.
Robert Orben
Lincoln was known to have walked miles to borrow books, to get the most rudimentary form of education. So what do we do on his birthday? We close the schools!
Robert Orben
Individuality' is the key to success.
Robert Orben
Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
Robert Orben
Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.
Robert Orben
Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
Robert Orben
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben