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You wouldn't want Alan Greenspan to write the instructions for assembling a beach chair.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Instructions
Chair
Instruction
Chairs
Beach
Wouldn
Write
Assembling
Writing
Alan

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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
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Wait'll next year! is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
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Successful salesman: someone who has found a cure for the common cold shoulder.
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My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
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A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
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Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.
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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
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It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Hong Kong its the way the egg rolls.
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To exercise is human not to is divine.
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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Did you ever figure to be living in a time when your check is good, but the bank bounces?
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If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
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Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
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I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
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The Playboy Calendar this year has some tiptop models. Any more top and they'd tip.
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They're combining that new fertility drug with a birth control pill for people who don't want triplets.
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Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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Sports like baseball, basketball, and hockey develop muscles. That's why Americans have the strongest eyes in the world.
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Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
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