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It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Hong Kong its the way the egg rolls.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Avenue
Avenues
Cookies
Crumbles
Eggs
Hong
May
Kong
Way
Cookie
Rolls
Madison

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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'
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The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
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If you can laugh together, you can work together.
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If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
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In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
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They say kids today don't know the value of a dollar. They certainly do know the value of a dollar. That's why they ask for five.
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There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
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For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.
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Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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President Ford used humor a great deal.
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To exercise is human not to is divine.
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Realists know where they're going. Dreamers have already been there.
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As much as we admire all the characteristics of a Ronald Reagan, as soon as something goes wrong, people will hate those same characteristics.
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Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?
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Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
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Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.
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Summit meetings tend to be like panda matings. The expectations are always high, and the results usually disappointing.
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I don't want to say anything about my kids...but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!
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