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Summit meetings tend to be like panda matings. The expectations are always high, and the results usually disappointing.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Like
Summit
Meetings
Tend
Expectations
Usually
Panda
Results
Pandas
High
Mating
Always
Disappointing

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To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
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Sports like baseball, basketball, and hockey develop muscles. That's why Americans have the strongest eyes in the world.
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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
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Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.
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Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, Guess Who? She's a divorce lawyer.
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Lincoln was known to have walked miles to borrow books, to get the most rudimentary form of education. So what do we do on his birthday? We close the schools!
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Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.
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To reduce stress, avoid excitement. Spend more time with your spouse.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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Individuality' is the key to success.
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The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it.
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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!
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Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
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We have enough people who tell it like it is - now we could use a few who tell it like it can be.
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Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
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Do you realize what would happen if Moses were alive today? He'd go up to Mount Sinai, come back with the Ten Commandments, and spend the next eight years trying to get published.
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