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I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Kids
Home
Back
Find
Take
Parenthood
Children
Parenting
Way
Everywhere
Always
Funny

More quotes by Robert Orben

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My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.
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To exercise is human not to is divine.
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I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
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If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
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I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'
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Sociologists say that going to the movies is a bonding experience. It probably has to do with the way you feet stick to the floor.
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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Sports like baseball, basketball, and hockey develop muscles. That's why Americans have the strongest eyes in the world.
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In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
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A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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If you can laugh together, you can work together.
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For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.
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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!
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Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
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I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it - after all, they've already given us tasteless bread.
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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
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Nowadays, you cannot be a very Effective political figure without Having a demonstrable sense of humor. People take to it.
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