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I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
Robert Orben
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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Way
Everywhere
Always
Funny
Kids
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Parenthood
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Parenting
More quotes by Robert Orben
Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
Robert Orben
When we laugh we temporarily give ourselves over to the person who makes us laugh.
Robert Orben
Lincoln was known to have walked miles to borrow books, to get the most rudimentary form of education. So what do we do on his birthday? We close the schools!
Robert Orben
It's amazing how important your job is when you want the day off - and how unimportant it is when you want a raise.
Robert Orben
Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.
Robert Orben
To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Robert Orben
There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers.
Robert Orben
The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
Robert Orben
Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
Robert Orben
I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'
Robert Orben
Summit meetings tend to be like panda matings. The expectations are always high, and the results usually disappointing.
Robert Orben
We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.
Robert Orben
Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
Robert Orben
You wouldn't want Alan Greenspan to write the instructions for assembling a beach chair.
Robert Orben
I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it - after all, they've already given us tasteless bread.
Robert Orben
All that means is that something devastating can happen to you today or to your family & all you can do is cry about it or panic or just be grief-stricken about it but a year or two from now or maybe ten years from now, or maybe two months or two days, you might be able to see the humor in that problem.
Robert Orben
Sports like baseball, basketball, and hockey develop muscles. That's why Americans have the strongest eyes in the world.
Robert Orben
Sociologists say that going to the movies is a bonding experience. It probably has to do with the way you feet stick to the floor.
Robert Orben
Individuality' is the key to success.
Robert Orben
Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
Robert Orben