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Successful salesman: someone who has found a cure for the common cold shoulder.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Someone
Shoulder
Cure
Cures
Shoulders
Cold
Successful
Common
Found
Salesman

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Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down.
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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You wouldn't want Alan Greenspan to write the instructions for assembling a beach chair.
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We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.
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Summit meetings tend to be like panda matings. The expectations are always high, and the results usually disappointing.
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Nowadays, you cannot be a very Effective political figure without Having a demonstrable sense of humor. People take to it.
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There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
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As much as we admire all the characteristics of a Ronald Reagan, as soon as something goes wrong, people will hate those same characteristics.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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Sociologists say that going to the movies is a bonding experience. It probably has to do with the way you feet stick to the floor.
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Anybody with a good sense of humor is one-up on their competition. We respond to somebody who has the ability to make us laugh. It's a bonding influence.
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Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.
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The Playboy Calendar this year has some tiptop models. Any more top and they'd tip.
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.
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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!
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Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
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When we laugh we temporarily give ourselves over to the person who makes us laugh.
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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.
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