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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Problems
Two
Problem
Sinai
Today
Aspirin
Come
Tablets
Many
Mount
Would
Moses
World
Carry

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We have enough people who tell it like it is - now we could use a few who tell it like it can be.
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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!
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In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
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I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.
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Happiness is contagious. Be a carrier!!
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Wait'll next year! is the favorite cry of baseball fans, football fans, hockey fans, and gardeners.
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Anybody with a good sense of humor is one-up on their competition. We respond to somebody who has the ability to make us laugh. It's a bonding influence.
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Individuality' is the key to success.
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Did you ever figure to be living in a time when your check is good, but the bank bounces?
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Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
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Realists know where they're going. Dreamers have already been there.
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To reduce stress, avoid excitement. Spend more time with your spouse.
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If somebody accuses you in a story of being a crook, you can demand that they prove it. But if a comic says it and you protest, people say, 'What's the matter, you can't take a joke?
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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