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The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Birthdays
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More quotes by Robert Orben

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If you can laugh together, you can work together.
Robert Orben
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Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down.
Robert Orben
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Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
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Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
Robert Orben
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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
Robert Orben
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Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
Robert Orben
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THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
Robert Orben
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I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
Robert Orben
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In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
Robert Orben
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Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
Robert Orben
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Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
Robert Orben
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What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?
Robert Orben
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When we laugh we temporarily give ourselves over to the person who makes us laugh.
Robert Orben
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I don't want to say anything about my kids...but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!
Robert Orben
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There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the losers.
Robert Orben
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The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.
Robert Orben
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To exercise is human not to is divine.
Robert Orben
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All that means is that something devastating can happen to you today or to your family & all you can do is cry about it or panic or just be grief-stricken about it but a year or two from now or maybe ten years from now, or maybe two months or two days, you might be able to see the humor in that problem.
Robert Orben
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The Playboy Calendar this year has some tiptop models. Any more top and they'd tip.
Robert Orben
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If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
Robert Orben