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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
Robert Orben
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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Quitting
Worried
Health
Worry
Funny
Away
Fitness
Worrying
Quit
More quotes by Robert Orben
I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
Robert Orben
I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.
Robert Orben
Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
Robert Orben
Humor starts like a wildfire, but then continues on, smoldering, smoldering for years.
Robert Orben
Faith, indeed, has up to the present not been able to move real mountains.... But it can put mountains where there are none. Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
Robert Orben
Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
Robert Orben
Do you realize what would happen if Moses were alive today? He'd go up to Mount Sinai, come back with the Ten Commandments, and spend the next eight years trying to get published.
Robert Orben
I don't want to say anything about my kids...but I go to PTA meetings under an assumed name!
Robert Orben
For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.
Robert Orben
Have you noticed when you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
Robert Orben
Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?
Robert Orben
All that means is that something devastating can happen to you today or to your family & all you can do is cry about it or panic or just be grief-stricken about it but a year or two from now or maybe ten years from now, or maybe two months or two days, you might be able to see the humor in that problem.
Robert Orben
Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.
Robert Orben
Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.
Robert Orben
Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
Robert Orben
THe world now has so many problems that if Moses had come down from Mount Sinai today, the two tablets he'd carry would be aspirin.
Robert Orben
They say kids today don't know the value of a dollar. They certainly do know the value of a dollar. That's why they ask for five.
Robert Orben
Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
Robert Orben
A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
Robert Orben