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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.
Robert Orben
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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Worried
Health
Worry
Funny
Away
Fitness
Worrying
Quit
Quitting
More quotes by Robert Orben
All that means is that something devastating can happen to you today or to your family & all you can do is cry about it or panic or just be grief-stricken about it but a year or two from now or maybe ten years from now, or maybe two months or two days, you might be able to see the humor in that problem.
Robert Orben
There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
Robert Orben
Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
Robert Orben
Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
Robert Orben
Do your kids a favor - don't have any.
Robert Orben
Do you realize what would happen if Moses were alive today? He'd go up to Mount Sinai, come back with the Ten Commandments, and spend the next eight years trying to get published.
Robert Orben
In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative fight, flee - or laugh.
Robert Orben
I may be forty, but every morning when I get up, I feel like a twenty-year-old. Unfortunately, there's never one around.
Robert Orben
What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?
Robert Orben
Faith, indeed, has up to the present not been able to move real mountains.... But it can put mountains where there are none. Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Robert Orben
A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
Robert Orben
Humor is the most honest of emotions. Applause for a speech can be insincere, but with humor, if the audience doesn't like it there's no faking it.
Robert Orben
The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.
Robert Orben
There are only two kinds of people in this world. The realists and the dreamers. The realists know where they are going and the dreamers have already been there.
Robert Orben
When we laugh we temporarily give ourselves over to the person who makes us laugh.
Robert Orben
Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.
Robert Orben
Nowadays, you cannot be a very Effective political figure without Having a demonstrable sense of humor. People take to it.
Robert Orben
Successful salesman: someone who has found a cure for the common cold shoulder.
Robert Orben
Anybody with a good sense of humor is one-up on their competition. We respond to somebody who has the ability to make us laugh. It's a bonding influence.
Robert Orben
Happiness is contagious. Be a carrier!!
Robert Orben