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Quit worrying about your health. It'll go away.

Robert Orben

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Robert Orben
Age: 96
Born: 1928
Born: March 4
Magician
Writer
the United States of America
Health
Worry
Funny
Away
Fitness
Worrying
Quit
Quitting
Worried

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A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
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President Ford used humor a great deal.
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It's amazing how important your job is when you want the day off - and how unimportant it is when you want a raise.
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They're combining that new fertility drug with a birth control pill for people who don't want triplets.
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We're supposed to take our problems to a family adviser. Personally, I've never met a family adviser. They're all off somewhere listening to dirty stories.
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There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
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Vacation: When you spend thousands of dollars to see what rain looks like in different parts of the world.
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What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?
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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'
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You wouldn't want Alan Greenspan to write the instructions for assembling a beach chair.
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Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
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Live your life so that if someone says 'Be yourself' it's good advice.
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Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.
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The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
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Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?
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Happiness is contagious. Be a carrier!!
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Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.
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The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it.
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Faith, indeed, has up to the present not been able to move real mountains.... But it can put mountains where there are none. Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
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