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Streets full of water. Please Advise.

Robert Benchley

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Robert Benchley
Age: 56 †
Born: 1889
Born: September 15
Died: 1945
Died: November 21
Actor
Humorist
Journalist
Screenwriter
Worcester
Massachusetts
Humor
Full
Water
Funny
Advise
Streets
Please

More quotes by Robert Benchley

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A freelance is one who gets paid by the word -- per piece or perhaps.
Robert Benchley
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Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got.
Robert Benchley
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She sleeps alone at last.
Robert Benchley
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I am pretty sure that, if you will be quite honest, you will admit that a good rousing sneeze, one that tears open your collar and throws your hair into your eyes, is really one of life's sensational pleasures.
Robert Benchley
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A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
Robert Benchley
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It has always seemed to me that the most difficult part of building a bridge would be the start.
Robert Benchley
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The art of cursing people seems to have lost its tang since the old days when a good malediction took four deep breaths to deliverand sent the outfielders scurrying toward the fence to field.
Robert Benchley
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I never liked bananas much anyway. Two-thirds of the way down even one banana I am willing to concede defeat smilingly and give the rest to the nearest monkey.
Robert Benchley
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If Shakespeare were alive today and writing comedy for the movies, he would be the head-liner for the Mack Sennett studios.
Robert Benchley
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At fifteen one is first beginning to realize that everything isn't money and power in this world, and is casting about for joys that do not turn to dross in one's hands.
Robert Benchley
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An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
Robert Benchley
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The knocking out of a pipe can be made almost as important as the smoking of it, especially if there are nervous people in the room. A good, smart knock of a pipe against a tin wastebasket and you will have a neurasthenic out of his chair and into the window sash in no time.
Robert Benchley
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Next to a shot of some good, habit-forming narcotic, there is nothing like travelling alone as a 'builder-upper.
Robert Benchley
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Work is a form of nervousness.
Robert Benchley
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For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.
Robert Benchley
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We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door, simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.
Robert Benchley
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Sunday morning may be cheery enough, with its extra cup of coffee and litter of Sunday newspapers, but there is always hanging over it the ominous threat of 3 P.M., when the sun gets around to the back windows and life stops dead in its tracks.
Robert Benchley
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Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman without feeling just a bit unchivalrous.
Robert Benchley
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All laughter is a muscular rigidity spasmodically relieved by involuntary twitching.
Robert Benchley